Alas! Who is humble? We disclaim perfection, and run down the preachers of it, from a general confused consciousness of our unworthiness, but cannot bear to be told of a trifling error in conduct. What management, gentle insinuation, and nice art of address, is necessary to prevent resentment in such cases, even from a friend! (Thomas Adam, Private Thoughts on Religion)
“The heart is more deceitful than all else And is desperately sick; Who can understand it?” (Jeremiah 17:9).
How many people really believe that they are less than perfect? How many people believe that they are sinners every day? How many people believe that they are totally depraved? How many people really believe that they are vile in the sight of God in and of themselves? How many people really believe that they are unable to do one good thing apart from Christ? Perhaps there are some to even many depending on the question, but how many people really believe these things about themselves so much that when they are insulted they will know that they ae far worse than the insult? Clearly, then, it is easier to believe and/or attack a theological and/or intellectual doctrine than it is to deal with our own hearts and to believe the truth about ourselves.
It is far easier to desire humility than it is to have it. It is far easier to pray for humility in words than to desire it from the heart. It is far easier to act humble in the presence of others than it is to really be humble. How we want others to treat us so gently and be so nice to us, but we don’t realize that these are the desires of our pride and it is really pride trying to keep itself hidden from others and self. Oh how easy it is to utter words to God in confession of our sin, but when one accuses us of far less than we have confessed we get angry. What is that but a demonstration of the hideous pride of our hearts and of the fact that we have confessed sin in a hypocritical way? What is that but a demonstration that we are little if any better than the hypocritical Pharisee who prayed to himself saying that he was glad he was not like those other people?
Jesus blasted the Pharisees for being whitewashed tombs that were full of the bones of dead men, but isn’t that true of us as well when we are so ready to confess things to God and yet get angry when the least thing is said to us by others? We believe that we are washing our externals (though we may insist they are internals) which is something like the Pharisees whitewashed the tombs while in the depths of our souls we are full of self (dead men’s bones). How filthy are the most beautiful things that are only external while they are death and decomposing bodies in them. Such is the body of a human being that is doing good works and religious things and does them for the wicked goal of self-love, self-fulfillment, and pride. Yet humility is spoken of as a wonderful thing and as a beautiful thing, though indeed it is not humility that is spoken of for the vast majority of the time in the modern world. True humility only comes by suffering and hard things.
The reason that true humility is hated while it is spoken of so highly by the world and by the professing Church is because the truth of what true humility really is has been virtually lost. In the modern world humility is thought of as admitting that we may be wrong or perhaps simply not having as much pride as one could have. So it is thought that the humble person is one that does not assert self or is quiet during unpleasant circumstances. It is thought that a humble person will do nice things for others and praise others. In fact, however, those are things that are not inconsistent with the worst kind of pride. It is pride to admit that one may be wrong about the existence of God and of the Gospel of grace alone. It is pride to be full of self and simply not act prideful. It is pride not to assert self when that is done because of self-love. It is pride to do nice things for others and do them out of self-love. It is pride to praise others when one wants to be thought of as nice or helpful when helping others.
Oh how our hearts are so full of the wickedness of pride and self when we try to hide our pride under the mask of humility, but also when we are so easily offended and provoked. Our hearts are so full of self and pride when people have to strive to make things easy for us to listen to because we are so sensitive and touchy. What a wicked thing it is to react in anger or hurt when someone points out something we have done wrong. When we react in anger or hurt it demonstrates that we are far worse than what has been said to us. Who is humble? Jesus was humble. Only those who have Him as the life of their hearts have true humility, but they have a lot of room for growth. In the modern day true pride is exalted while true humility is not understood and certainly not wanted. In fact, it is despised. How sinful our hearts are to be so full of self and be so touchy based on that self.